What exactly is it I speak of?? Recently, I was confronted for reasons unknown. Needless to say I was not beyond the limits of self, to meet this challenge with force adequate to repel the threat. There were moments where I was going to face the threat with the behavior I imagine was sought out by this individual, luckily when I gaze into the abyss, I remain true to the idealized vision of self perception, I would seek to retain for myself. But there were flashes of a more haunting reality, a man quote simply relegated to regression, as a means of Dealing With indifference. So where does fantasy come in/help? I’ll tell ya.
Master Yoda and his principle teaching concerning a Jedi and the use of the force. It is said to seek oneness in the light, the force or power must be used for defense…never for attack. I don’t imagine I will be moving things with my mind, or cutting, slicing, or for that matter even dicing anything with a blade of light, and yet the truth in this geeky, wondrous bit of fiction can be seen by even the most unaware in the lore of all things Star Wars. There are things and ideals that are grounded in reality and the truth that is their composition, places their standard of governance, within the sacred. Truth be told, I have not felt the adrenaline I was subjected to, in a long while and I almost feel as if, had I reacted it would have been nothing outside of devastating for myself and the other party involved. Unfortunate. It is, the true actor the antagonist sits behind the curtain pulling at the strings of this poor and miserable individual guiding what could have been a painful, arresting, or undesired outcome with regard to this soul . It is these moments, that the responsibility of not allowing the situation to snowball out of control causing unknown chaos and peril to ensue. Hence, as with the jedi…patience and calm must be the mainstay and permanent principal that life must be measured by. Nothing can be accomplished through the primal instincts that we find as a first option. Even now, I feel an anger that is pulsating within my being at the occurance and continued thought as it is played in a loop in my head. Yet, I will not let the anger, pain, and torment of ignorance be my guide. I will persevere and continue to seek peace, calm, and hope. As the patient man will suffer for the perception of long periods of time, but the reward for the resolve and dedication to being upstanding will eventually (it is hoped) be a reward that is laudable and may only be known to the individual, but in the long scheme, the merits of my actions are good and if I never see a reward I know I did the right thing.
Whether I could have torn through him this person is not an issue for consideration, the issue is the fact that I was about to react contrary to who it is I desire to be, and there is someone specific to blame for that. I say may God bless her in her own inequity. (I am not a liar, and hope he damns from this day until her last. Her soul is a darkness that only exists to darken the brightly lit sky that is made for the world to enjoy)
With that said…do have a blessed day.